


Introspection

by mewgirl1995



Series: Wordplay [2]
Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Light Is Not Kira, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Murder Mystery, Sibling Bonding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-07 17:14:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12845763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mewgirl1995/pseuds/mewgirl1995
Summary: Years after the Gema case, criminals begin dropping dead one after another. Suspicions rise that the murders may be orchestrated by one killer. Throughout the case, L and Light are forced to face some hard truths about themselves and their future.





	1. Chapter 1

Snow settled on the balcony, covering it in a light dusting of sparkling powder. The fireplace burned with soft wisps of flames. Everything seemed serene. Lounging on the couch, Light stared across at L who laid in a more scrunched up position with Light's feet in his lap. He rubbed gentle circles into them, glancing up at Light every now and then with a small smile. "I missed you," Light said quietly. "You were gone almost all winter." 

"You missed my massages," L said with a straight face. With a slight frown, Light glanced away, pressing his lips tightly together. Raising his eyes, a smile flitted across L's face. "I missed you as well. Unfortunately, that case took much longer than I expected."

"I'm sure it was such a hassle to be held up in Paris." Light didn't mean to sound petty, but the aggravation slipped into his voice anyway. 

The one thing he still had not gotten used to while living with L was his constant, extended absences. Half the time, Light felt as if he alone lived in their apartment. It was his items that decorated the walls and his food that lived in the fridge. The only change when L returned was the sudden appearance of cake, cookies, and ice cream. It felt like they shared too little of their life with one another. Light still knew very little about L's childhood or about Watari. He tried not to let it bother him.

"Let's go sometime," L said. "You would like it." 

"I could have gone with you." 

With a quiet sigh, L squeezed Light's foot a bit harder than he was used to, making him flinch. "You have a job here, don't you?"

It was a touchy subject. L preferred to work alone. He would cooperate with various organizations on different cases, but for most of them it was just him who solved them. Light had never been able to quite come to terms with that. He sometimes wondered if the Gema case had gone on for just a little longer if L would have been more amenable to Light always working alongside him. Though, Light didn't always agree with the methods L was willing to use. Deciding to drop the subject, Light picked up his glass of wine and took a sip. "Sayu graduates from college in a month." 

"Oh? Does she?" 

"Yeah," Light said. "I keep asking her what her plans are afterwards, but she just avoids the question." L let go of Light's foot and shifted, jumping forward on the couch to lay on top of Light. "Careful! You almost spilt wine everywhere!" 

"How harsh," L said quietly. "I just wanted to be closer to you."

With a slight smile, Light set his wine aside and pulled L closer. He kissed him, running his hand through his hair. It was soft, still slightly damp from the shower. As usual, L's lips were slightly chapped and Light could taste the chocolate from the cake he had eaten early. He pulled back slightly, shifting to kiss L's cheek and down to his neck. "Let's go to bed early." He trailed his hand down L's back, rubbing it gently.

"Perhaps," L said softly. He sighed and nuzzled his head against Light's. "It's not very late yet." 

"We can sleep in tomorrow too." 

"I think-"

An alarm interrupted L's quiet words. He pulled away, sitting up as he reached for his phone. "What is it?" That particular alarm usually sent L away on a case. A spark of irritation spread through Light. He had just gotten back. He sat up as well, letting L slip into his lap. "Is it Watari?" 

"Apparently Aozora Yukio just died." L stood and headed away from the couch, typing on his phone. 

"That Yakuza member who got away with murder last year?" Light asked. He leaned back on the couch. "That's not really bad news. He should have gotten the death penalty." Glancing over at L who was heading down the hallway, Light sighed. "How is this a case?" He stood and followed, curiosity spreading through him. 

"It's just another odd coincidence." L pushed open the door to his office and walked over to the chair, perching at the edge. He tapped a few keys and pulled up a list containing about fifty names. "A string of criminals have died from heart attacks in the past few weeks." Pushing his thumb against his lips, L stared at the screen. "Most of them were never convicted for their crimes. Some were given life sentences instead of the death penalty." 

"You think someone is killing them?" Light asked, eyes scanning the names. "Almost all of these people are from the Kanto region." 

"I'm not sure what to think yet," L said. "I'm just keeping an eye on it." He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "It seems highly unlikely that someone could kill all of these people with heart attacks. It's just too strange."   

Wrapping his arms around L's shoulders, Light kissed him on the neck, moving up to lean his head against his. "Don't worry about it right now. Let's go to bed." L reached up and grabbed one of Light's hands, kissing the back of it. "Let's sleep in tomorrow, we don't have anything to do until dinner."

"Ah yes, I do enjoy dinner with your family." 

"Don't sound so excited."

Turning to look up at Light, L smiled. "My birthday present will the best I hope you know." Standing, L tugged on Light's hand and pulled him towards their room. "I know you the best." There was a smugness in L's voice. He took pride in being the only one to see through Light Yagami's perfect mask. With a small grin in return, Light followed behind him. 

  

There was a suit laying on the bed. It looked freshly laundered and ironed. L stared at it with a disdainful look. "I'm not wearing that." He looked to Light with a slight grimace.

"We're going to Narisawa, you have to dress up."

"We should just go somewhere else." 

With an exasperated sigh, Light crossed his arms and glared. "Mom and Dad saved up for this you know."

Eyes darting between the suit and Light, L considered his options. Sachiko Yagami already viewed him with a mild distaste. She probably wanted Light to date a rich beautiful woman. One who followed most social customs. Angering her any further would not be a good idea. At least he knew that he had Soichiro and Sayu's respect regardless of what he did. "Fine, but we're going out for ice cream afterwards." 

The suit was restrictive. It was only the second time L had worn it. Watari bought it for his birthday years ago and he immediately stuffed it into the back of his closet. Tugging on the sleeves, L looked to Light who stared out the window, focused on driving. He still looked very similar to when they first met. With the years, he matured slightly more but still was very handsome. "You know, your face always been very symmetrical." Light glanced briefly at L with an amused look. "It makes you more attractive than most by at least 30%."

"Only that?" Light asked with a quiet laugh.

"It's quite a bit actually." 

They slowed to a stop as they arrived at the restaurant. "They're not too busy tonight." Light glanced to L and reached out to hold his hand. "Ready?" 

"I suppose." 

It was risky showing his face in public, but over the years L had started to bend the rules Watari and he had set into place. He always rationalized it, saying that everything would work out fine as long as he used his alias. Though he knew that was yet another thing that Sachiko did not like about him. It was clear that she was the only one who did not know his true identity. L sometimes wondered how Soichiro didn't trust her enough to reveal that information. Though he might have never discussed it out of respect to L. 

"Light! Ryuzaki!" Sayu nearly leapt from her chair, waving them over. She stood and rushed to Light to hug him. "Happy birthday big brother!" She wore a sleeveless red dress with a longer back than the front. As she moved the fabric danced around her legs. While Light had changed little over the years, Sayu had grown up quite a bit. She turned to hug L next. "It's good to see you!"

While Light kissed his mother on the cheek and exchanged a firm handshake with his father, L slipped into the seat next to Sayu. He set his present beside the others and gave a courteous nod to Soichiro and Sachiko. Light slid into the seat onto his other side. "Twenty-five years old," Soichiro said with a smile. "Where has the time gone Light?"

"You're so grown up now," Sachiko agreed. "And you've advanced through the NPA so quickly." 

With a smile, Light said, "Only because Dad's worked so hard to prepare me for everything." 

L added silently that it was Light's own ambition that drove him, though he always passed it off as a sense of duty to his parents. The waiter came around to collect their orders, sending L a judgmental stare. Despite being forced into a suit, under no circumstances was L going to sit normally. 

"Open your presents!" Sayu said, interrupting her parent's fawning over her brother. She shoved hers toward him. He pulled off the ribbon and opened the small box. "You love it right?" 

Nestled inside the box was a wallet embroidered with Light's name. It matched the one Sayu had given L just a few months ago. "Thank you," Light said, pulling the wallet out to open it. 

As usual Soichiro gave Light an assortment of ties that he could wear to work. Sachiko gave him a book of poetry. L grinned from behind his tea cup. Later they would spend the night discussing the symbolism and making fun of the author's poor attempts at literary genius. As Light reached for L's present, it was clear that he was holding back a huge smile. Inside the poorly wrapped box was a small notebook. 

"And this is?" Light asked. 

"You tell me." 

Raising an eyebrow, Light flipped through the box. His smile widened. "These all are ciphers," He said. "You wrote all of these." 

"They should be difficult to solve. If they are not, they I'll write harder ones next year." 

Sachiko shot a confused look at her husband and then daughter. It was clear that the significance of the present was lost on her. "Thank you Ryuzaki." Light reached over and squeezed L's hand, brushing his thumb over the back of his hand. 

Within another few minutes their dinner arrived. The idle conversation changed to a more pointed interrogation. "Sayu," Sachiko said with a smile. "Since we're all gathered here together, you should tell us what you plan to do after graduation in the spring!" 

Pushing her food around with her fork, Sayu sighed. "Do we really have to talk about it now?" L hoped that they wouldn’t. He did not want to be present when Sayu revealed her plans to Sachiko. 

"I'm curious too." Light leaned forward, grinning at his sister. "What are your big plans?" 

"Are you planning on becoming a teacher?" Sachiko said. "You've always been so good at helping the younger students." 

"No, I'm not planning on-"

"Are you planning on going into finance?" Soichiro asked. "It's a steady field and you did minor in economics." 

"No." 

"Then, what about-"

Sayu slammed down her fork and glared at her parents. "I'm taking the national exam and joining the police academy!" Several people glanced in their direction at the outburst. Both Sachiko and Soichiro were shocked. Light looked mildly surprised, glancing at L out of the corner of his eye. 

"That's ridiculous," Soichiro said. "You aren't prepared for that kind of training at all! How could you possibly be planning to join the NPA?" 

"That's much too dangerous of a job, wouldn't you prefer something else?" Sachiko chimed in.

"In the basic training there is intense physical training." Shaking his head, Soichiro sighed. "You have never even done judo or-"

"I know judo." 

Before Sayu spoke L wouldn't have thought that the Yagamis could look any more shocked.

"Where in the world did you learn judo?" Sachiko gasped. It was as if her daughter had just told her she committed murder. 

L sunk into his chair slightly as Sayu burst out, "Ryuzaki taught me! He's been preparing me for the entrance exam and the academy training!" 

"What?!"

All eyes were on L. He desperately wished he could disappear. "You've been doing what?" Soichiro asked, voice stern. "Ryuzaki, how could you?" 

"Well, I taught her capoeira first," L said, tapping his fingers on the table nervously. He pressed his thumb to his lips as he spoke. "Naturally, judo was the next step and we were talking about the NPA. Did you know that at most women only make up 5% of the NPA? It's quite an abysmal statistic." Light's hand was at his mouth, clearly attempting to stop himself from laughing. At least he wasn't angry at the revelation.

"That's exactly why she shouldn't join the NPA!" Sachiko said. She almost looked like she would cry as if finding out her daughter wanted to join the police was the worst news in the world. "It's too dangerous! Sayu should have a nice safe job!" 

"And who keeps those kinds of things safe Mom?" Sayu snapped back. "I've seen what it's like to be an officer and I am willing to put my life on the line." As Sachiko gasped, Soichiro shook his head. Sayu's hand shifted to her chest, where the scar of the heart and roman numeral for six were. They would have been visible if not for the coverup Sayu wore. Usually she covered them with scarves. "I am more than prepared to enter that academy." 

Once again, Sachiko was glaring at L. "She has proven herself quite capable," L said. 

"Sayu, you need to reconsider this." There was a pleading tone in Soichiro's voice. "You're going to get yourself killed." 

"I always thought you wanted me to be more like Light!" Sayu stood abruptly, her chair screeching. "Now that I am, you're against it! I just can't be good enough for you, can I?" Whirling around, Sayu stormed out of the restaurant despite her parents' protests. L stood and hurried after her, not wanting to be left to face their anger. 

Outside it was snowing again. Sayu kicked the white powder in frustration. She pulled her coat tighter around her, muttering under her breath. L sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets as he spoke, "That could have gone better." 

"I hate them," Sayu said, continuing to kick the snow. "They're always so unreasonable. This is why I didn't plan on telling them until I passed the exam." Shivering, Sayu let out a shaky breath, watching the air billow around her. 

"Perhaps they would have been less angry if I hadn't been involved," L said, slipping off his coat. He wrapped it around Sayu's shoulders. "Your mother hates me. I think she would be overjoyed if I was ever killed." 

Giggling quietly, Sayu nudged L with her elbow. "She doesn't get it," She said. "If Dad told her who you really were I bet she wouldn't act so indifferent." 

Footsteps sounded from behind them and L felt arms around his waist. Light pulled him close, kissing him on the cheek. "Aren't you cold?" He asked softly. 

"Sayu was colder and I hated that jacket." 

"I'm sorry for ruining dinner." Sayu didn't meet her brother's gaze, instead choosing to stare at her feet. 

"You didn't ruin dinner," Light said. "Mom and Dad ruined dinner." Leaning his head against L's, Light continued, "I can't believe neither of you told me. What else have you been plotting behind my back?" 

"I wanted to surprise you," Sayu said with a sigh. "Not like this though." 

"I'm proud of you," Light said. "I think you'll do well at the academy." 

With a huge smile, Sayu turned to Light. Her eyes shone with excitement. "Really?" L felt Light nod. "That's a relief at least." 

"Well, since dinner's over," L said, switching the topic. "We have ice cream to get. Let's hurry before the café closes for the night."

Laughing, Sayu shook her head. "So that's how Light forced you into that suit!"


	2. Chapter 2

At that time of night the café was mostly empty. After ordering, L lead the Yagami siblings to a table near the back. "How was Paris?" Sayu asked, eyes bright with excitement. "I bet it was really pretty during winter."

With a shug, L took a huge bite of the ice cream sundae. "It was alright. It's nothing like being home." His words were followed by a warm smile in Light's direction. Despite the disastrous dinner with his parents, Light still enjoyed the evening. It was nice being together with L and Sayu again. Before Light could say anything, the familiar alarm went off on L's phone. 

"What's that?" Sayu leaned over L's shoulder to read the text. "Those are all criminals."

"Yes, and they've all died of heart attacks," L said, narrowing his eyes. "That makes almost a hundred deaths in the past month. The likelihood that this is just a coincidence is decreasing rapidly."      

 "They're at least violent criminals, aren't they?" Light said. "Perhaps we should be thanking this killer." He sighed and leaned his head on his hand, looking out the window. "A lot of times they get away without any punishment at all, even if we have all the evidence against them." 

L raised his eyes and met Light's gaze. "Regardless of why they're doing it," L said. "If they are committing these murders, this is a serial killer. They need to be caught." 

"Maybe they're just cleaning up the world," Light grumbled under his breath. 

"But how long until they start killing innocent people?" 

"How do we even know they will?" 

"Let's not argue!" Sayu said quickly. "There's no one someone can cause sudden heart attacks in hundreds of people!" 

With a sigh, Light nodded. She was right. The whole notion was ridiculous to begin with. L didn't look so convinced. He continued working on his phone as he ate, searching for more information about the deaths. It would be a difficult crime to solve. No wonder he was interested. As L set his phone aside and went back to eating his ice cream, Light heard footsteps approaching them. "Light! It's been such a long time!" 

Glancing up, Light saw Kiyomi Takada standing before him. They attended To-Oh University together, where she graduated second of their class right underneath Light. After graduation, Kiyomi went on to become a news reporter at NHN. "Oh, it has been a long time," Light said. "Nice to see you again." 

"I'm sure you've been really busy at the NPA these days," Kiyomi said with a smile. She leaned over and touched Light's arm, continuing on, "It was fun going out in college, maybe we could meet for a drink sometime?" 

That was not something he had been expecting. While Kiyomi was a beautiful woman, Light never saw their relationship going anywhere. They went on a few dates and Light got bored of her rather quickly. "Oh, actually I'm in a serious relationship." He shifted away subtly, making Kiyomi withdraw her hand.   

Before Light got the chance to introduce L, Kiyomi said, "Oh that's too bad then," She smiled and brushed her hand against Light's. Clearly, she was undeterred. "I suppose I'll have to try again another time." Before Light could say anything else, she waved and headed away, "See you again Light!" 

"That was awkward," Sayu said, watching Kiyomi as she left the café. She sipped her hot chocolate and looked to L, who was also watching the news reporter while sucking on his spoon. He had a sour look on his face. "What's wrong Ryuzaki?" 

 "Nothing is wrong." 

"You're not jealous, are you?" 

Light snorted at Sayu's comment. There was no way that L would ever be jealous. Though the look on his face suggested otherwise. He glanced briefly at Sayu before hurrying to continue eating his ice cream. With a smile, Light reached over and took L's hand, running his thumb over the back of it. "Kiyomi was a boring person. We only went on a few dates. It was never going anywhere." 

"Light has never been serious about anyone until he met you," Sayu added. 

"I'm not jealous of that woman," L said. "Stop being ridiculous." 

Clearly, Sayu's comments had struck a nerve. Light laughed and squeezed L's hand. "You have nothing to be worried about." Despite saying that, L didn't look entirely convinced.

Over the years, Sayu had trained hard and it paid off. She was quick on her feet, dodging L's kick and then quickly spinning on her heel in response. She made contact and in one swift kick, Sayu swept L's feet out from under him and he slammed into the ground. With a sigh, he stared up at the ceiling until Sayu's face appeared above him. "Usually you don't go down that easily." 

"Your skills have improved." 

As Sayu disappeared from his line of sight, L turned his head and watched her walk over to the table to grab her bottle of water. When they trained she wore a tank top and shorts, exposing many of the old scars. "I think something's on your mind." She gestured to L with a smile. "Your eyes give it away when you're thinking hard about something."  

"There is always something on my mind," L said as he leapt up to his feet. 

"I think you're still thinking about what happened with the newscaster," Sayu continued with a wry grin. "Because you were jealous." 

"Maybe I didn't get a lot of sleep the last few nights," L said. That fact was true, though he didn't want to continue and say the reason was because he was researching Kiyomi Takada the night they ran into her. Then the rest of the nights he laid awake, worrying about every little thing he could think of. 

Despite not voicing the real reason aloud, Sayu seemed to have caught his meaning. She turned and shook her head. "This is so unlike you. Wouldn't you say it's a bit irrational?" 

"That woman would have been a much better match for Light." 

Now that his worried thoughts were voiced, he knew he would never hear the end of it from Sayu. She gasped. "You are jealous! I can't believe it!" 

"I am not jealous. I was simply thinking of how things could have been different. I bet your mother would have adored Takada," L said. He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but was failing. He never felt such a strong feeling of distaste for anyone who wasn't a dangerous criminal. "She wouldn't have secretly trained you to join the NPA. She would have no problem wearing nice clothes and enduring a terribly boring family dinner." He was rubbing his thumb and forefinger together, feeling them grow hot from the friction. "Your parents would have blessed their relationship and happily counted down the days until their marriage when they would go on to have exactly 1.46 children and-" L broke off as he realized how angry he sounded. He blinked realizing there were tears forming at his eyes.

Sayu's eyes were wide in surprise. "L?" Turning his head away from Sayu, L quickly rubbed the tears away. He was being foolish. The quiet tapping of Sayu's feet made L look back up right as she hugged him tightly. "Who cares what anyone thinks? You two are so happy together!" 

The situation was more complicated than that. Before L met Light, he could have called himself content. He was neither happy nor sad. His life was simple and safe in an emotional sense. After A's death, he kept it that way on purpose, not allowing himself to get too close to anyone. However, after meeting Light, that emotional safety net snapped. L was not simply happy. Drug along with that new connection was every emotion imaginable. There was misery, anger, fear, and elation. In his mind, L added yet another emotion to the list: jealousy. L sighed and leaned his head on Sayu's shoulder. "I am more than happy with him." 

"Maybe you should talk to Light about this!" 

"And say what?" L said softly. He pulled away and walked over to the window and stared out, catching the concerned look on Sayu's face in the reflection. "Do you know who you reminded me of when I first met you, Sayu?" 

Tilting her head slightly, Sayu stared at him and said, "No. Who?"

"A young girl named Linda," He said. "She was curious. One day she asked me what I was frightened of." 

With a smile, Sayu walked back over to L. "Surely you're not scared of anything." 

"I am." L sighed and looked back at Sayu. "Like everyone, I'm scared of monsters." 

"Monsters?" 

"Have you ever considered that we are all surrounded by monsters of different kinds?" Drooping his head, L stared at the floor as he said quietly, "Monsters that kidnap children, monster that suck blood, there are so many different kinds." 

"Well that's why you're a detective right?" Sayu's voice was cheerful as ever. "To catch those monsters." 

"Yes, but there's another type of monster, those who tell nothing but lies." L rubbed his thumb and forefinger together as he spoke, not meeting Sayu's gaze. "They are much more cunning than others. They pose as humans even though they have no understanding of the human heart; they eat even though they've never experienced hunger; they study even though they have no interest in academics; they seek friendship even though they do not know how to love. Truthfully Sayu, I am that monster." He let out a quiet unsteady breath. "And that is why I am not deserving of Light's love." 

A moment after he finished speaking, he felt a sharp sting across his cheek and he looked up with an alarmed look, reaching up to touch his stinging face. Tears were in Sayu's eyes as she lowered her hand. "Don't ever say anything like that again! You are so self-deprecating! Do you know that L?" Before L could respond, Sayu threw her arms around him, pulling him into a tight hug. "Do you even know how much Light and I love you? Sure, you may be a little eccentric, but to call yourself a monster?" Her grip tightened. "It isn't true." 

"Sayu," L said softly. A warm feeling spread through him as he reached up and hugged her back. "I lost the only family I had before I met you two," L said quietly. "I am that monster because I failed her." 

"Shut up!" Tears fell onto L's shoulder and Sayu buried her face in his hair. "Don't say that. Don't you dare." 

"Sayu, I-"

"You're my hero," Sayu whispered quietly. "Because of you everything was pieced back together. It was so close to falling apart. It felt like Light was getting further and further away from me, slipping right out of my grasp. If the Gema case hadn't come along, if you hadn't come along, I would have lost him, I know it." She shook as she cried. "He was losing hope in this world before he met you." L remained quiet, processing the shock from hearing that. Light's life always seemed so perfect. L knew that he was unhappy, but he would have never guessed how truly unhappy he was. Still sniffling, Sayu asked, "Who was she?" 

L closed his eyes. Even years after her death, he could still see A's bright smile. "Her name was A. She was supposed to succeed me as L." Somehow it felt easier telling Sayu his past. He could never do it when face to face with Light. "She was my everything and she killed herself because she couldn't live up to the pressure of being L." 

"I'm sorry." 

"It was a long time ago."

Across the room, L heard his phone ring. He looked up towards it and pulled away from Sayu, who sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes. As L flipped it open to read the text, he hummed.  

"Is it more about criminals dying from heart attacks?" Sayu asked leaning over his shoulder. He held his phone up by his thumb and forefinger and stared. 

"Yes and also that the world governments are beginning to notice," L said, scanning the information. "Watari says ICPO is holding an emergency meeting to decide what to do." 

Grabbing her phone from the table, Sayu pulled up the news. "Apparently people have begun to notice too, they're calling him Kira." 

"Kira," L said with a sigh. "I thought I would get at least a little bit of a break." He looked back at Sayu, feeling guilty. Before he could say anything, Sayu approached him and took his hands. 

"Promise me you won't think that about yourself anymore," She said. "Okay? Then, I'll let you throw yourself into your work." 

"I promise." For once, L felt certain that his promise wasn't a lie.   

If Light stood in front of the store much longer people were going to wonder what he was up to. He sighed and stared inside the window at the array of gaudy rings. It was annoying to say the least that Takada had assumed he was single. At this point in his life he knew there was no one else for him beside L. Everyone else was simply too boring. He wanted the world to know that L was his and he was L's. However, they had never discussed marriage. Light turned to leave, but paused, staring in at the display again.   

"I could surprise him," Light said quietly. He turned back to the store. All he had to do was go inside. The associate would see him and ask what he was there for. At that point there would be no backing down. 

"Light!" Glancing over, Light saw Matsuda waving to him. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be getting home?" 

"I am on my way home," Light said, shaking his head. "I was just-"

"Were you looking at wedding rings? Are you and Ryuzaki getting married?" 

Light wasn't sure if the red blush on his face was from the cold or embarrassment. "I have to go Matsuda." Light decided to flee inside the jewelry store, knowing the other detective wouldn't follow him.      

"Hello sir," The associate said, raising her head. "How may I help you?" 

"I'm looking for a pair of wedding bands." Once the words left Light's mouth the decision was final.

The first few pairs the associate showed him were gold or gold and diamond studded. In Light's opinion they were far too gaudy. His eyes trailed over the display until he found the display for silver and white gold wedding bands. "How about these?" Light pointed to a pair of slim, white gold bands. They were beautiful, but not flashy. 

"Excellent choice sir!" 

All that was left was to pick up a nice bottle of white wine and one of L's favorite chocolate cakes. Light ignored the pounding in his chest as he rode up the elevator. The box with the rings felt heavy in his pocket. Smiling, Light pushed open the door. "I'm home!" There was no response. Light frowned and glanced down. L's tennis shoes were there, so he must have been home. Slipping off his own shoes, Light walked inside and set the cake and wine on the table. "L?" Again, there was no response. With an irritated sigh, Light headed to the office. Of course, L found some way to ruin his perfect surprise.  

Every screen was filled with information, L sat before them, alternating between typing and dropping sugar cubes into his tea. "Ah, you're home." 

"Another case already?" Light walked in, staring the screens. "Kira?" 

"The serial killer who is murdering criminals," L said. "That's what people are calling him." He spun in his seat, glancing up a Light with a smile. "The world governments are very concerned. While the murders began in Japan, they've spread across the world. Any violent criminal has been killed regardless of whether or not they've been convicted." He flipped to another page on the screen, pointing. "However, Kira has also begun killing non-violent criminals. Many people are declaring Kira to be a god." 

It was interesting. Light leaned forward, eyes darting across the words spread before him. He had to admit that he still felt that it wasn't necessarily a bad thing that Kira was doing. One statistic in particular caught his attention. "Crime has been decreasing," He said with a small, pleased smile. 

"The decrease is not statistically significant yet," L said, brushing off the observation. 

"Maybe this isn't such a bad thing L," Light said and he truly meant it. "How many people have we arrested only for them to get away? Kira is punishing them, isn't he?" He almost continued on to say that Kira was making the world a better place, but the words stopped before leaving his mouth.  

"If I didn't know you better I would think you were Kira," L said, continuing to work. It seemed to have been meant to be a harmless comment, but Light flinched. 

"You think I'm capable of murdering hundreds of people?" 

"I was simply suggesting that you share some of your ideals of justice with Kira." 

Anger flared up in Light. "I would never do the same thing that Kira is doing!"

"Yet you agree with his ideals." L looked up at Light with an intense look, there was something unreadable in his eyes. Clenching his fist, Light turned and stormed out of the room. "Light?" 

There was no way that Light agreed with a serial killer. He shoved aside his frustrations with the criminal justice system and took a deep breath. Though he found himself questioning his own beliefs. If he was granted with the power to kill hundreds of criminals, seemingly effortlessly, would he? Walking out onto the balcony, Light shook his head. Of course, he wouldn't. He would never kill that many people, even if there was a chance it would make the world a better place. That kind of power could only corrupt a person. It would turn them into a monster. Leaning over the railing, Light pulled the rings from his pocket. How could L think that about him? It seemed like an eternity before Light put the rings away and turned inside. 

Sitting at the kitchen table, L stared over with a curious expression. "What is this for?" He asked, pointing to the cake and wine.

"Nothing, I'm going to bed." 

Kicking her feet over her as she laid on the bed, Misa Amane scrolled through her the news stories on her phone. "Kira, huh?" She said with a curious smile. Looking up at the creature nearby, she continued, "They must have a Death Note, right Rem?" 

The shinigami nodded. "It seems so." 

Humming quietly, Misa flipped over and laid on her back. "They must be pretty brave to kill all those criminals. I could only bear to kill that robber before I never wanted to look at the Death Note again!" She looked to Rem with a worried look. "Do you think the police is going to catch Kira? Maybe I should help him." 

"Why would you want to do that Misa?" Rem asked. She shifted slightly. "The police will catch Kira and punish him." 

Sitting up quickly, Misa set her phone aside and walked over to her desk. She pulled out her pigtails and grabbed a brush, smoothing out her hair. "I should get working on designing the fall collection of dresses!" Rem walked over, gently touching Misa's shoulder and took the brush from her. Misa hummed contentedly as Rem brushed her hair. "Kira can handle those criminals." Meeting Rem's gaze in the mirror, Misa continued, "I also have to get ready for my album debut. I've been working really hard." 

"You have." 

"Maybe that handsome police detective will listen! Remember him, Rem?" Misa cocked her head to one side as she thought. "The one who stopped that terrorist attack at Tokyo Tower when we were there?" Tapping her forefinger on her lips, Misa lit up. "Light Yagami!" 

"Yes, I remember him." 

"I'd love to see him again." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your kudos and comments. As always there will be updates on Mondays and Wednesdays.


	3. Chapter 3

The NPA headquarters were in an uproar. Light slipped in quietly. He hadn't slept well, thinking about Kira and Kira's motives all night long. It seemed as though he would spend his whole day investigating Kira. "Light," Soichiro said, walking over to place a firm hand on his son's shoulder. "Come on. We have a new briefing about Kira." Light nodded and followed his father. As he put his hands into his pocket, he felt he still had the rings in his pocket. 

"So Light, how did it go?" Matsuda fell into step alongside Light, eyes wide with excitement. He peeked at Light's hands, clearly searching for the ring. 

"Not now," Light said quietly. "We should be focusing on the case." 

"I just wanted to hear the happy news about your engagement!" 

"There is no engagement!" 

Shocked, Matsuda's steps faltered. "What? He said no?"

"I didn't ask." 

Before Matsuda could say anything else, Light hurried to walk alongside his father. "Based on the murders, L suspects that Kira is located in the Kanto region." He glanced at Light out of the corner of his eye and chuckled. "Though I'm guessing he already told you that?" 

Considering Light pretended to be asleep when L finally came to bed and then got up much earlier, leaving to eat breakfast at a café rather than with him, Light did not know that. He decided he did not want to discuss his relationship issues with his father and lied, "Yeah." 

"We're currently searching through toxicology reports to find out if the criminals were all poisoned," Soichiro sighed as he spoke. "Though so far there appears to be no sign of any toxins in their systems." 

There were no clues linking the deaths at all. It seemed as if each person just spontaneously had a heart attack and died. Sighing in frustration, Light flipped through case file after case file. They were chasing their own data in circles. It was not going anywhere. "This must be some massive coincidence," Light said, mumbling under his breath. "I can't see any way a normal human could do this." 

"Some people are calling Kira a god." Light looked up to see Takada standing in front of his desk. She smiled and held out a coffee for him. "I'm here to speak with some of the officers about the case. I'd like to arrange a formal press conference by the end of the week." 

"Go talk to my father then." Light lowered his eyes back down. He did not take the cup. "I'm sure he can answer all of your questions." 

"You seem pretty stressed Light," Takada said. She clearly didn't understand that he had no intention of speaking to her. "Are you and your girlfriend having issues?" 

"Boyfriend," Light corrected. 

"Oh, I see." 

"And we are not having issues." 

With a quiet hum, Takada set the coffee on Light's desk. "What do you think of Kira?" 

It became obvious she didn't plan to leave until Light answered at least some of her questions. He took a deep breath and put on his best fake smile. Looking back up at her, Light said, "I'm not entirely sure that Kira exists. Why should we believe that someone is capable of killing hundreds of people across the world with heart attacks?" With a shrug, Light continued. "I mean, if Kira really wanted to prove he was a god, couldn't he do something more to prove his existence?" 

"Some of the new Kira worshippers on the Internet are suggesting the same thing," Takada said. She brushed a loose piece of hair behind her ear. "What do you think about the decrease in crime?" 

 "The decrease is not statistically significant yet," Light repeated L's statement from the previous night. "Even if crime is decreasing, Kira is breaking the law and must be stopped." Light picked up the coffee and took a sip, grimacing slightly. It was bitter. 

"What's wrong? I thought you liked black coffee."

"I used to." After years of L making Light's coffee incredibly sweet, Light developed a taste for it. He set the cup aside. "You should go talk to the chief." 

Nodding, Takada went to walk away. "I'll see you later Light." 

The cake was slightly melted from sitting out all day long. Still, L hadn't put it into the refrigerator. He hadn't even eaten any of it. Sitting at the kitchen table, L stared at the cake with a mixture of worry and annoyance. Why had Light bought it? The bakery was far away from their house. Eyes darting to the wine, L sighed. It seemed like the pair of treats was a bought for a special purpose. What had Light been planning before L angered him? 

The door opened. "I'm home." 

"Welcome home, why did you buy this cake?" 

An annoyed look crossed Light's face. "I felt like it," He said, glancing away as he walked into the kitchen. L pressed his thumb to his lips as he watched him. 

"You're lying. What's the real reason?" 

"Why can't I just go out and buy cake for no reason?" Light snapped back. He was clearly irritated. When L went to bed the previous night, Light was pretending to be asleep. Then he got up and left early. L had laid in bed, listening to his soft footsteps with an ache in his chest. 

"Are you still mad that I insinuated you were similar to Kira?" 

With an exasperated sigh, Light threw open a cabinet and snatched down a wine glass. "No, I'm perfectly okay with the fact you compared me to a serial killer." 

"That sounds like sarcasm." 

"It is sarcasm. Of course I'm mad at you!" Popping the cork off of the wine bottle from the previous night, Light continued, "You are the most irritating person I have ever known!" L's heart dropped. Why had he made him so angry? Was he that incapable of keeping a relationship intact?

"Light, I don't seriously think you are a serial killer." 

Light filled the glass, glancing up slightly to glare at L. "I'm sure you think I could become one based on your comments." 

Blinking, L tilted his head slightly. He never said anything like that. Then, he remembered something from a long time ago. The words were loud in his head, echoing in the prison cell. L remembered clenching his fist in anger at hearing Beyond Birthday's taunt. He knew that it would bother Light. Yet, L had turned around and expressed a very similar sentiment. He cursed himself for being so heartless. 

Quickly standing, L was by Light's side in a few strides. He wrapped his arms around his waist, leaning his head in the crook of his neck. "I'm sorry." While Light stiffened at first, he relaxed quickly, easing into L's touch. "You could never be anything like Kira or any serial killer for that matter." 

"L, I-"

"You have so much power over me Light," L continued, cutting him off. "And I realize I must have the same over you. I know I can be callous." Tightening his grip, L kissed Light's neck. "It hurt knowing you were angry with me. Please forgive me for hurting you." The wine glass clinked as Light set it down. He turned around, cupping L's face and pulling him close to kiss him. 

"I love you." Light pulled away briefly to speak before kissing L again, pushing him against the kitchen counter as he pressed their bodies together. 

"I love you too," L managed to say between kisses. His hands were in Light's hair, pushing it back away from his eyes as they kissed. Trailing his hands down, L pulled at Light's tie, undoing it. He felt Light's hands pushing his hair back as well. In one quick motion, Light slid his hands down and pulled L up, bracing under his legs. L wrapped his arms around Light's shoulders, kissing him on the neck as he walked over to the couch. 

The doorbell rang, startling both of them. L tumbled out of Light's arms back onto the couch as he jumped in surprise. "Who the hell is that at this hour?" Blinking up at him, L smiled as he saw how flushed Light's face was. 

L sat up and watched as Light walked open to the door, opening it to see Sayu with a mischievous grin on her face. "Oh, did I come at a bad time?" Sayu asked, tilting her head. "Your tie is a bit messed up Light. Oh and what's that on your neck?" Light slapped a hand over the freshly forming bruise and glanced away, not meeting his sister's gaze. Giggling, Sayu slipped inside. "I brought dinner, since you two have a habit of not feeding yourselves during cases." She held up the takeout bag and headed over to the kitchen. "Sorry for interrupting." 

As Light hurried to smooth his hair down and pull off his tie altogether, L stood and walked over to the table again. "Thank you. By the way, have you picked out your hakama for graduation yet?" 

"Yeah, do you want to see it?" Sayu hurried to pull out her phone. "You'll both be there, right?" 

"Of course," Light said with a small smile. Irritation was obvious on his face from his forced smile to the annoyed look in his eyes. He gently braced his sister's shoulders. "Thank you for dinner. You should hurry home before it gets much later."

"Light!" Sayu protested as he shoved her towards the door. "You can have sex with your boyfriend whenever you want! How often do you get to have dinner with your little sister?" Face turning red again, Light shoved her out the door and quickly shut it, turning back to L with a soft smile. 

  

The press conference was held at the end of the week in a large conference room in the NPA headquarters. Kiyomi Takada was the moderator and the panel consisted of Soichiro, a representative from the FBI director, and a representative from the ICPO. By that time, Kira's killings had changed. Light stood slightly behind his father with the rest of the detectives, listening as Takada asked him to address the latest details. "So far there has been not many new developments," Soichiro said. 

It was a lie of course. The day before almost ten victims across the country died with the same message written on their cell walls in their own blood. "Kira is real," The message read. L had immediately ordered for it to be kept secret from the media. It was obvious that Kira was testing the extent of his powers.

"But the murders have continued?" Takada asked.

Soichiro shifted back and forth as he nodded slightly. "Yes, they have." 

"And we are confident that Kira lives in the Kanto region?" 

"To the best of our knowledge, yes." 

The crowd of citizens whispered amongst themselves in response. Light glanced around the room, growing bored of the repetitive questions and fake assurances to the public. He looked towards the back of the room, where L leaned against the wall, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible, though he smiled when he met Light's gaze. Reaching into his pocket, Light felt the small box. His heart pounded hard at the thought of finally asking L. He knew it was ridiculous. There was no doubt in his mind that L would say yes. Despite that he wished the press conference would end as soon as possible.

"As we finish up for today do you have anything else to say?" Takada asked. 

With a nod, Soichiro stood, leaning over the podium as he stared across the crowd and to the cameras. "What Kira doing is murder. He may be trying to disguise it as a selfless act of justice, but he is a serial killer just like any other. We will catch Kira and we will prosecute him to bring him to true justice." 

A round of applause spread through the room, Light smiled and nodded as he joined in clapping. They would catch Kira. It wouldn't be long until they had him cornered. Their list of suspects was shrinking every day and soon they would narrow it down enough to find Kira. As the applause began to die down, Soichiro stumbled. "Chief Yagami?" Takada asked, voice filling with concern. "Are you-"

With a hand to his chest, Soichiro collapsed to the ground. Light's eyes widened in terror. The world seemed to stop as he rushed forward, ahead of the other detectives. "Dad!" He dropped to his knees, grasping his father's hand in his own. "What's wrong?" 

"Light," Soichiro choked out. "My son..." He tried to say something else but it was too late. His grip on Light's hand loosened. Light's eyes were wide in shock as he watched his father's hand fall away from his own. 

"Dad?" Light's voice was a whisper as he grabbed his father's hand again, squeezing gently. "Dad!" The whisper turned into a scream as Light shock his father's body. His eyes were dull and lifeless. "No! You can't die! Open your eyes!" Everything ached as Light held Soichiro's body closer. "Come on Dad! You can't lose to him!" Tears poured from Light's eyes. He vaguely felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Takada. "Get up! You have to keep fighting!" With one last scream, Light pressed his head against his father's chest. "No!" 

"Light," Takada said. "I'm so sorry." She smoothed her thumb over his shoulder. Everything about her soft touch felt wrong. Light shrugged her off, sobbing as he clutched at Soichiro's suit jacket. 

Another hand touched Light's shoulder, curling around it and pulling him closer. "L," Light choked out, letting himself be pulled into a tight embrace as he released his grip on Soichiro. "L!" He cried out again and looked up to meet L's concerned gaze. "Dad's dead. He's dead!" L's hand was in his hair, smoothing it down gently as he pressed his face against the top of Light's head. "Kira killed him!" 

"Calm down Light," L said softly. "I'm here." That was all Light wanted to hear. He clung to L, sobbing into his shoulder. "I have you." 

Everything he knew had been ripped away from him in an instant. Soichiro had raised him. He instilled every ounce of his own determination, passion, and morality into Light. It was all gone. They would never be able to discuss cases again. They would never get to go out to boring family dinners again. Kira had torn it all away in an instant. 

"I'll kill him," Light whispered, hands clutching the fabric of L's shirt tightly. "I won't let him get away with this." No matter what it took, Light swore that he would catch Kira. The man behind the cowardly killings was no god. He was just as vile as the rest of the world he was claiming to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always thanks for your kudos and comments! Updates are on Mondays and Wednesdays.


	4. Chapter 4

"You need to be more careful." Watari's scolding was gentle, but firm. "I believe I have managed to erase all of the footage showing your face but-"

"I know." L leaned against the railing on the balcony, shivering slightly in the cold spring air. "It was careless of me, but Light needed me there." 

"He also said your real name." 

With a sigh, L nodded. "I doubt anyone beside the reporter heard and no one beside you was watching his lips that closely to understand what he said." 

"Yes, that is true." After a brief pause, Watari continued. "Tell him that I am sorry for the loss of his father." 

With a quiet click, Watari ended the call. L slipped the phone back into his pocket and stared inside. Light hadn't moved from his spot on the couch. Walking quietly, L leaned over the couch and hugged him. Light held his watch in his hands, staring it with a mournful expression. L nearly asked him if he was alright, before deciding that it was bad idea. He remained quiet until Light said, "I can't believe he's gone."

"I promise you, we will catch Kira." 

Light nodded. His earlier anger had died out and L saw a numb pain in his eyes instead. Rubbing Light's shoulders briefly, L stood back up and walked over to pick up Light's suit jacket from where he tossed it aside onto the couch. As he walked into the bedroom to hang it up, he noticed it felt heavier than normal. Reaching into the pocket, L found a small black box. He frowned, tilting his head slightly. 

"What's this?" Flipping open the lid, L's eyes widened in surprise. Two white gold wedding bands were nestled inside. That explained the cake and the wine. He cursed himself for even bringing up Kira that night before tucking the box back into the pocket and hanging up the jacket. When Light did finally bring up the topic of marriage, he would say yes. Though it was not a good time to discuss it at the moment. 

When L returned to the living room, Light glanced up with a blank expression. Heart aching, L returned to him, kissing him softly and running a hand through his hair. He had never seen him in so much pain before. As he sat down on the couch beside him, Light turned and buried his face in chest, curling close to him. They sat in silence for a long time. Running his fingers through Light's hair, L trailed his hand down his body, resting it on the curve of his back. He pulled him a bit closer and leaned his head on Light's.

The doorbell chimed quietly. L raised his head to look over. He pulled away from Light despite his quiet protests, "Just leave it." L suspected he already knew who was at their door. Almost as soon as he opened it, Sayu rushed into his arms, sobbing loudly.

L knew he wasn't the best at comforting others, but he tried his best. He hugged Sayu tight, smoothing her hair down as he did with Light. "I didn't want to be alone," Sayu whispered, burying her face in L's shoulder. 

"I understand." 

"Sayu?" Light's voice sounded even more broken than before. 

Leaving L, Sayu ran to her brother, hugging him tight as she continued to cry. Once again, Light's eyes filled with tears as he hugged his sister back. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect him." 

"It's not your fault!" Peeking up at L from her brother's arms, Sayu sniffed. "You'll catch him right? You'll stop Kira?" 

"Of course," L said. He walked back over to his place beside Light. "We will bring Kira to justice." 

"Let me help you," Sayu whispered. "I know I'm not a police officer. I haven't even joined the academy yet, but I want to find Kira. I want to stop him before he hurts anyone else like this!" She looked to L and he nodded. "I'll do whatever you need."

"Right now, I need you both of you to not worry about the case," L said quietly. Light looked to him with a confused look. He reached out and touched Light's cheek, stroking his skin with his thumb. "Take this time to mourn your father." Nodding, Light closed his eyes and leaned into L's touch.   

The curtains were drawn and Misa paced her room with the Death Note clutched tightly to her chest. "I could help the investigation, couldn't I Rem?" She asked, worry creeping into her voice. "I know how Kira is killing and Kira's no longer just killing criminals either! He's even going after the good guys!" There were tears in her eyes as she said, "Did you see how sad Light looked?" 

"It would be dangerous," Rem said. She seemed unsure. "Why would the police trust that you are not Kira?" 

"There's only one name in my notebook," Misa said. "Plus, if I helped them find the real Kira, then they'd know I was telling the truth." She paused in her pacing. "But how do I find the real Kira?" She turned to Rem with wide, curious eyes. "Can you help me find Kira?" 

For a moment, Rem looked as if she was not going to answer. Then with a deep sigh, she nodded. "I can grant you the gift of shinigami eyes."

"What's that?" 

"It gives you the ability to see any human's name and lifespan," Rem said quietly. "However, you cannot see another Death Note user's lifespan. That will allow you to find Kira." Excited at the prospect, Misa nearly spoke but Rem continued, "In order to get the eyes, you must trade half of your lifespan. Is helping in that investigation truly worth it?" 

"Yes!" Misa said. "If I got the chance to help Light, then everything would be perfect!" She spun around on her heel, giggling happily. "I want the eyes Rem!"   

"You cannot take this decision back. Are you absolutely sure?" 

It was rare for Rem to not outright do what Misa wanted. Why was she so hesitant? Misa's smile turned into a small pout. "It's fine isn't it? I have lots of years left because of the rest of Gelus' lifespan got added to mine, right?"

"That is correct." 

"So, it's not an issue!" Misa strolled over to Rem and took her hands, holding them tight. "Give me the shinigami eyes!"

Rem was silent for a long time before sighing and bowing her head in defeat. 

"As you wish Misa."  

The NPA headquarters was silent. Tension filled the air as Light walked to his desk. He kept his head held high, ignoring the worried whispers. "Hey Light," Matsuda said. Suddenly all eyes were on him. He held out a stack of folders to Light. "These are all the criminals killed by Kira over the past few days." 

"What the hell are you doing?" Aizawa asked, eyes wide. 

"We can't just stop investigating the case!" Matsuda protested. "If we do, then Kira wins!" 

"Kira already won," The voice came from Koreyoshi Kitamura. He shook his head as he walked into the office. "The room was filled with police officers and not a single one of us were able to stop Soichiro from being murdered. Whatever Kira is killing with, it's out of our control." 

Clenching his hands, Light glared at the commissioner. Matsuda turned to face the director with a determined look as he said, "We have to keep investigating or Chief Yagami would have died for nothing!" 

Another detective, Ukita stood as well to face Kitamura. "I agree, we can't let Kira get away. I'm sure that L will continue to investigate, so we need to as well!" 

"I won't let Chief Yagami's death mean nothing!" Mogi joined the ranks of detectives, breaking his typical quiet spell. 

"You're all crazy," Kitamura said with a shake of his head. 

Light glanced amongst the detectives, realizing that they were all the same men who stood with his father against Gema. He turned to the commissioner with a frown. "I will lead the investigation. Let any detective who wishes to help me join. We must catch Kira and we will." Kitamura looked surprised at the sudden declaration. "Everyone is right. Even if some of you could find some way to excuse Kira's actions before, he has killed a police officer. If you are too cowardly to stand against him, fine, but I will not let my dad's death mean nothing!" 

Stuttering in an attempt to find words, Kitamura turned away. "Fine. Lead a task force, but you will have to provide me with results quickly. I will not fund a futile investigation." 

It would only be a matter of time. Light would catch Kira as soon as possible and bring him to justice. With a nod Light said, "Understood sir." 

As Light expected all the officers who joined the task force were the same as those who helped capture Gema years ago. It was decided that Light and L's apartment would be the home base for the investigation. All of the detectives headed over there right away. As Light pushed open the door, he saw that all of the furniture had been pushed aside. The other detectives crowded around, peeking in curiously. L and Sayu were in the middle of the living room sparring. Impressed, Light watched as he sister nimbly dodged L's attacks. She spun across the floor, moving quickly to grab his wrist and slam him to the ground. 

"Wow!" Matsuda said, eyes wide in excitement. "That was awesome Sayu!" The pair looked over with startled expressions. Sayu stood quickly and let L up.  

"You brought Matsuda over?" L asked, confused. Then he saw the rest of the detectives. His eyes darted across their faces before he made a quiet hum of realization. "Oh, the NPA doesn't want to investigate the Kira case any longer do they?" 

"Kitamura is a coward," Light said as everyone filed inside. "So we formed our own Kira investigation team." 

"Just like the Gema case," Sayu said. She hurried over to her brother, eyes determined. "I'm ready to help Light." 

"Yes, let's all work together and catch Kira." 

There was a cheer from the task force members and Light noticed a small smile on L's face. He walked over to Light and reached out to take his hand, squeezing it gently. "Take the lead why don't you?" He teased. "It's not like this is my investigation or anything."

"We'll work together as equals." L nodded, meeting Light's determined look. 

 

The task force's first clue came to them in the form of a letter addressed to the NPA headquarters. It had no return address and seemingly was untraceable. L wanted to do additional prodding into its whereabouts, but they were working on limited time. "They claim they have information that will benefit the case," Light said, scanning the letter with a hardened expression. "That they know how Kira is killing." 

"Can we trust this?" Aizawa voiced his concerns first. 

"I don't see what Kira would gain from luring a detective to a quiet afternoon lunch," Light said with an irritated sigh. "After all, he could just kill us whenever he wanted. Our names and faces became public knowledge after the Gema case." 

"So, should we go?" Matsuda asked. 

It was a good question. Was it worth risking their lives on a flimsy lead? Even if they choose to meet with the writer of the letter, there was no guarantee the information would get them anywhere. Light clenched his hands, wrinkling the paper. They had nothing. All they had was a list of suspects who shared Kira's sense of justice. There was no proof that any of them were actually behind the murders. Knowing that, Light was left with one question. Which one of the task members should go meet with the supposed informant? It was a situation that needed to be handled carefully.  

After glancing around the gathered detectives, Light said, "I'll go." It was reasonable for him to take the risk to catch his father's killer. 

The rest of the detectives nodded in agreement, though both L and Sayu looked alarmed. "But Light," His sister began. "What if it is a trap?" 

"It's worth the risk," Light said, shaking his head. "We have to see what they know." He pointed to the letter. "We have one day until the meeting, which gives us only a little time to try to figure out as much as possible about this person." He waved his hand. "There's no time for discussion. We need to get started right away." He felt L's hand on his and glanced at him with a confused look. 

"I agree that we should go," L said quietly. "But we still need to be careful. Don't act rash tomorrow." Light nodded, smiling as L took his hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. "It would destroy me to lose you." 

"I know."

The café was located in the quietest part of downtown. L chewed on his thumb as he watched the video feed. He wondered who would be waiting for Light. The instructions were very explicit, there was no way that he would stumble across the wrong person. As Light entered the café and turned to search for the table, Sayu and Matsuda gasped, "That's Misa Misa!" 

Sitting at a table in the far back corner with a strawberry parfait was the famous blonde model. L narrowed his eyes. "That fits the description." 

"A model, really?" Light muttered under his breath. "What could she possibly know about this case?" Regardless of their doubts, Light walked over to the table. If L could see his face, he was sure he would have seen a sweet smile as Light said, "Hello. I think I'm meeting with you here?" 

A surprised gasp escaped Misa's lips. She nodded as Light slid into the booth. "I didn't know they were going to send you!" She said in a high-pitched voice. "It's so incredible to see you again Light!" 

"When in the world did Light meet Misa Misa?" Sayu asked. "And why did he never tell me!" L shushed her. 

"Ah that's right," Light said quietly. "You were at the Tokyo Tower terrorist incident." Misa nodded and before she could say anything else, Light continued, "What do you know?" It was a bit blunter then his normal questioning technique. 

 With a nod, Misa reached into her bag and pulled out a thin black notebook. On the front of it was written, "arvc-5." L tilted his head slightly. That was a gene that caused sudden heart attacks in those unlucky enough to inherit it. "This may sound really, really crazy," Misa said quietly. "But I swear I'm not lying." 

"What is that?" Light asked. 

"It's called a Death Note."

All of the members of the task force exchanged confused glances. "That sounds like some childhood prank," Aizawa said. 

"Death Note?" Light asked. He reached out to take it and Misa jerked it away. 

"You have to promise not to scream when you see her!" 

That was a strange statement. "See who?" Light asked as L pushed his thumb to his lips.

"Rem." 

With an irritated sigh, L reached over and grabbed his piece of cake. "She isn't the best informant. All of her answers are vague." He took a bite and stared at the screen. 

"She's a shinigami," Misa continued, voice quiet. 

The plate fell to the floor shattering on the ground. Everyone around L leapt in surprise. His eyes were wide in shock. "Shinigami? Those aren't real! How-How ridiculous!" 

"L?" Sayu asked with a concerned look. "Are you okay?" She touched his shoulder and his eyes snapped to her. With a deep breath, he nodded. His hands were trembling still but he clenched them to stop it. How dare Beyond Birthday continue to affect him in that manner. 

"Alright, let me see the notebook." Light reached out and his fingers brushed the cover. He dropped it almost immediately and a screech sounded as he slid back in his chair. "What the hell!" 

With a finger to her mouth, Misa shushed him. The rest of the task force leaned closer. Nothing had appeared on the screen. "I know she's kinda scary, but she won't hurt you."

"Light?" L asked, voice trembling. "Is there really something there?" 

"Yes," Light said softly. He also seemed unnerved. While L couldn't see Light's face, he saw that his hand was shaking just the tiniest bit. 

"What's in the notebook?" L asked. 

Reaching out again, Light picked up the notebook and flipped it open, tilting it slightly so the camera could see the text on the inside cover. Light gently traced his fingers over the first few words, "The human whose name is written in this note shall die." Immediately, Light flipped to the first page. Only one name was written there, printed in neat writing. L searched for it immediately. 

"That's the name of a murderer who was killed years ago," L said quietly. "He murdered Misa Amane's parents in a botched robbery then died of a sudden heart attack." 

"Kira has one of these too," Misa said. She had a worried expression when Light didn't respond right away. "Please don't think too badly of me. I swear that I've only used it once! I was too disgusted to use it again."

"Assure her that her murder will go unpunished," L said.

With a quiet sigh, Light flipped back to the cover. "Don't worry," He said. "Though I have to ask. How can we be entirely sure that this works?" His hand traced over the next rule. As L had previously suspected, the user of the Death Note required a face and a name to kill. After a few moments, Light shifted again. "Your existence does not mean this book actually works." 

"Is he talking to the shinigami?" Aizawa asked. 

"I don't know. Light, we can test the Death Note on a prisoner whose execution is scheduled for today. Give me a moment to locate one and set it up with Watari." 

Leaning forward, Misa smiled. "I also have another secret," She said batting her eyes at him. "You can make a deal with the shinigami to gain one of their powers. I traded half my lifespan to gain the shinigami eyes." 

Again, L froze. He felt his heart rate quicken. 

"I can see anyone's name and lifespan with them," Misa continued. "Except for someone who also owns a Death Note. Using these, I can find Kira for you!" 

It wasn't real. Everything about the situation made zero sense. If Misa was telling the truth, then Beyond Birthday really could see when people would die. He had been born with some sort of supernatural power. Though there was also the chance he was a Death Note user himself. 

"Prove it." Light pushed the notebook back over to Misa. "I'll show you a picture of a criminal who will be executed today and if you write his name down and he dies, we will believe everything you've told us." 

"Of course!" Misa said. She seemed more than happy to prove that she was telling the truth. Within a few minutes, L sent over the picture. The task force all watched in nervous anticipation as Light showed the photo to Misa. "Huang Zhu? Is that right?" L flinched. Luckily only Sayu seemed to notice. Misa hummed to herself and wrote down the name, glancing up with a patient expression. "We only have to wait forty seconds." Setting the pen down, Misa reached out and placed her hand over Light's. "I'm sorry that your dad died. That's what spurred me to come help! You seemed so upset." 

Light pulled his hand away. "If you had helped earlier maybe he wouldn't have died." His voice was cold and unforgiving. Misa shrunk back a bit. She played with her spoon as the seconds ticked by. 

"You're really handsome Light, do you have a girlfriend?" 

"Is this really the appropriate time to be flirting?" L growled under his breath. Sayu sent him a sympathetic look. 

Though L quickly got a warm sense of satisfaction as Light harshly shut Misa down, "Don't flirt with me. I have a boyfriend and I have no intentions of ever leaving his side." 

An awkward silence fell between the pair as L watched the clock. His phone began to ring almost right on cue. "Hello? Watari?" He answered, holding it cautiously. 

"I just got word from the prison that Huang Zhu has died of a heart attack." 

"I see, thank you." L shut his phone and nodded to the rest of the team. "Light, that Death Note is real." They were one step closer to catching Kira.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of a longer chapter for you guys this time. As always thanks for all your kudos and comments! Updates are on Mondays and Wednesdays.


	5. Chapter 5

After proving that the shinigami eyes and Death Note were real, Misa accompanied Light back to the NPA headquarters where the rest of the investigation team, except L, waited. "Wow, everything's so fancy!" Misa walked around, eyeing the computers and boards in the small meeting room. Light sighed. He hoped they would find Kira quickly so he wouldn't have to spend much more time with Misa. His eyes looked to Rem. The creature hovered close to Misa, watching the investigation team with a hard look. They had all reacted to her with more obvious fear than Light had and most of them were still watching her. 

"Misa," Light said. "Here's pictures of our prime suspects." He projected the images up onto the screen. "L and I think that Teru Mikami is the most likely one to be Kira. He is a prosecutor who-"

"None of them are Kira," Misa said as she stared up at the pictures. Her quick response caught Light off guard. 

"What do you mean none of them are Kira?" L said from the laptop. 

With a shake of her head, Misa pointed to the pictures. "I can see all of their life spans so none of them have a Death Note." 

"All of our suspects eliminated immediately," Aizawa said as he shook his head. "What are we supposed to do now?" 

Clenching and unclenching his fist, Light sighed. "Isn't it obvious?" He pointed to Misa and continued, "If she sits out in a busy part of downtown, scanning the crowds we can attempt to locate Kira that way."

"If that fails," L said. "We can hold another press conference and scan the crowds beforehand. Perhaps Kira will show up to watch his victim die. Of course, we won't actually hold the press conference." 

Regardless of their methods, Light was determined to catch Kira. "Hopefully it won't come down to that." He held out his hand to Misa. "In the meantime, I'll hold onto that." Misa's eyes darted from the Death Note to Light before she cautiously handed it over. "When this is over we are destroying this." 

"No, you are not." It was the first time the shinigami had spoken since the café. Rem glared at Light. "Whatever you do to that notebook, you must not destroy it." 

"Why?" Light asked with irritation in his eyes. "It's a dangerous weapon." 

"Lock it away if you must, but if you attempt to destroy that notebook then I will kill every one of you." 

Rem's threat felt heavy over the task force. With a nervous nod, Light tucked the Death Note into his bag. He decided not to question the shinigami's reasons. It would be safer to just do as she said. He'd rather not anger a god of death. 

With a plan set in motion for the following day, Light returned home. He set the Death Note on the coffee table in plain sight. L picked it up, glancing around with a nervous expression. "That shinigami never leaves Misa's side," Light assured him as he sat down on the couch next to him. 

"I see." L opened the notebook and looked through the rules. "I never thought we would have to throw all logic out the window to complete this case." With a sigh, he set the notebook aside. "That one object contains so much power. We need to keep its existence secret. I fear the world governments would certainly find a use for it." He pressed his thumb to his lips, eyes darkening. "And it wouldn't be good." 

"I agree," Light said. "We'll lock it away somewhere and throw away the key." He watched L with a contemplative look and stuck his hand in his pocket, feeling the small black box. He had kept it on him constantly, hoping for the right moment. Every one of his plans had been thrown aside in favor of the case. 

Before Light could say anything, L spoke up again, "For now we should store it somewhere safe." 

"I'll put it in the suitcase." 

Light stood and picked up the Death Note, holding it gingerly as if just touching it would bring doom upon their world. He walked into their bedroom and pulled down the suitcase, flipping the letters to spell Lawliet. The lock clicked open. Light pushed the gun aside and pulled open the pocket to slide the Death Note in. As he did, he caught sight of something. With a frown, Light pulled out a picture that was tucked deep into the pocket. He stared it the unfamiliar women with a growing frown. Light clutched the photograph tight in his hand as he walked back into the living room. 

"L?" 

The woman's bright green eyes were shining. Light tore his gaze away as L looked his way. "Yes? What is it?" 

The computer beeped and L turned his attention back to it. Light's hands shook as he stared down at the picture. He racked his brain, but he knew he had never met anyone with strawberry blonde hair. He had never seen her before in his entire life. 

"Who is this?" 

Still typing, L asked, "What are you talking about?" 

"This woman!" Light threw down the photograph. He clenched his hands as L glanced over. 

The second L's eyes landed on the picture, he froze. His face went pale as he looked from Light back to the photo. "Oh." He pushed a thumb to his lips. "That's one of the orphans from Wammy's House." 

"Why do you have a picture of her?" Light was struggling to keep his voice even. "Surely she's important enough to-"

"I don't want to talk about this right now." 

"How convenient!" Light snapped. He pushed his hair back and took a deep breath. "Will you ever tell me anything about yourself?" 

"This is not the time. We have to focus on capturing Kira." 

"When is the right time then, L? Who is this? Why is she important enough to keep a photo of her?"

L purposefully didn't meet Light's gaze. He bit his thumb and shook his head. "It doesn't matter."    

The questions were racing through Light's head. He was already leaping to conclusions. He just wanted to know the truth before he thought any lowlier of himself. "Yes it does!"

"It doesn't." 

"Well obviously if you're so resistant to telling me, she must be a girlfriend of yours," Light said, voice growing in volume. "How stupid of me to think that I was the only one you loved. Clearly, I was wrong. It must have been wrong of me to think I was that important to you!" 

"Light-"

"It's too bad I'm not privileged enough to know this information about your life. I really would like to know these things before I wasted all my time on-"

"She's dead!" 

It was the first time L had ever raised his voice at Light. He froze in surprise and stared back as L raised his head and met Light's gaze with a cold look. Somehow that revelation made nothing better. L must have loved her to keep a picture of her around for so long. Light lowered his head, hair falling over his eyes. He should have felt like a jerk, but mostly he still felt betrayed. 

"That still doesn't answer my question. Why do you have a picture of her? Who is she?"

"Stop acting so childish," L said. He grabbed the picture and folded it, tucking it into his pocket. "Does it hurt your ego that much to know that I may have loved someone before you?" Light gritted his teeth as L stood and strolled over to him, hands in his pockets. "It was more than decade ago."

"So it's just another thing about your past that you will never tell me?" 

"Now is not a good-"

"There's never a good time is there?" Light whirled around and stormed from the living room, pulling on his shoes and jacket. 

"Where are you going?" 

"Out!" 

The door slammed behind him. As Light walked all of his anger and jealousy spread through him. There was very little he knew about L's past. The only thing he did know was that he was raised by Watari at an orphanage called Wammy's House. There, Watari, whose real name was Quillsh Wammy, trained the children to be detectives. L was the most successful of all of them. With a shaky sigh, Light wondered again who that woman was. Why was she so important to L? What made her so special? 

The cheerful ringtone from his phone startled Light. He glanced down and pulled out his phone, flipping it open. "Hello?" He said. 

"Light what the hell are you doing?" Sayu asked. She sounded furious. "Did you really just storm out of your apartment?" 

"How do you know that?" Light asked, mumbling under his breath. 

"Because I brought dinner over and you weren't there." Light said nothing as Sayu continued, "Plus, L looked devastated. What did you say to him?" 

"Why is this my fault?"

"We need to talk about this right now."

"Sayu-"

"Meet me at that café near your house. Now." 

Despite the fury in Sayu's voice, Light agreed. He hung up the phone and rubbed his eyes. It was not the time to be dealing with all their pent out emotional drama. They should have been focusing on catching Kira. Yet, that pretty photograph was the last straw. Light found himself unwilling to simply accept that he wasn't privy to L's past. He reached into his pockets and felt the small black box. With a sigh, Light pulled his hand away and turned back to go meet his sister. 

A cup of coffee and a small muffin awaited him. He sat down at the table, meeting Sayu's disappointed stare. Before she could speak, Light spoke first, "I found a picture of a woman in his suitcase." 

Pursing her lips, Sayu glanced down. She looked guilty. "Oh," She said. Light narrowed his eyes at her. "It must have been A." 

"A?" Light asked. He clenched his fist, before taking a deep breath and snatching up his coffee. "So he's told you far more than he's told me." 

"We talked about it recently. It only came up because he was scared that-" Sayu broke off. She fiddled with the zipper on her coat and glanced down, not meeting Light's gaze. 

"Scared that what?" 

"That he didn't deserve you." 

The words shocked Light. He froze, feeling as if Sayu had struck him across the face. "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." Mind racing, Light set down his coffee. "L is-" He stopped, searching for the right words. "L is the only one for me." 

Smiling, Sayu said, "Maybe you should tell him that instead of accusing him of keeping everything from you. Some things are just hard to talk about." 

Perhaps Sayu was right. Light picked at the muffin, leaning on one hand. It wasn't in L's nature to be open about his past. Maybe Light was taking it too personally. "What did he tell you?" 

"Not much," Sayu said. "A was someone really important to L. Apparently, she killed herself."

"Why?"

Shifting in her seat, Sayu quietly said, "I guess she was supposed to be a successor to the title of L. She couldn't live up to the pressure." Sayu licked her lips. "I think L loved her." 

"Obviously." Light leaned his face into his hands. "But I always thought-" He broke off and shook his head.

"Light, you shouldn't be this upset." Sayu reached out and laid her hand on Light's arm, rubbing it with her thumb. "It's in the past isn't it?" 

"Does that really matter?"

With an irritated sigh, Sayu shook her head and slammed her hands on the table. "Stop being an idiot!" Light stared back in surprise and several other customers glanced over with annoyed looks. "Sometimes you get so wrapped up in your own ego that you forget what really matters!" 

Though he didn't voice it, Light couldn't help but think how Sayu's sentiment was almost the exact same as L's. He sighed and stood. It was clear what he had to do. "I'm going home." 

Before Sayu could say anything, Light was out the door, hurrying down the block back to his apartment. He moved quickly, desperate to get back to L. It didn't matter who A was. None of L's past mattered. Light felt like a fool for getting so hung up on it. He opened the door and stepped inside, not surprised to find L exactly where he was before. The takeout Sayu brought over was untouched. 

L looked up, meeting Light's gaze with a frown. "Welcome home."

"You are the most self-centered, self-serving idiot that I know!" 

"Well you're the most egotistical and controlling idiot that I know," L said back with a wry grin.

With that established Light marched over to L, pulling out the little black box. "Despite that," He said, voice quivering slightly. "I still fell in love with you. Despite everything you're still the one I want to be with. Marry me?" 

With his thumb pressed to his lips, L's smile widened. "Yes, obviously. Did you even have to ask?"  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks so much for your kudos and comments.


	6. Chapter 6

The ring glittered in the sunlight. Light turned his hand back and forth, smiling as he watched the way the light reflected off of it. Misa was busy scanning the crowd for Kira, though she peeked over and watched him with a curious look. She sipped her drink and then said, "He must be handsome to capture your heart." Her lips turned into a small pout. 

"Do you see anything?" Light asked, ignoring her comment. "Any sign of Kira? We've already been out here for hours." 

"I know," Misa said with a quiet sigh. "But there's so many people!" 

"We need to find Kira quickly," Light said. His irritation was growing. What was the point of Misa's involvement if they were still clueless?

Rem glowered at him. "Misa is doing her best." 

Rubbing his ring with his thumb, Light sighed. "I know. I'm just-" He broke off and ran a hand through his hair. 

"Frustrated," L chimed in quietly in his ear. "I know Light, but we are very close to finding Kira." It was comforting to hear him. He wished L could be there as well, but then Misa would see his name. It was too much of a risk. Light knew that he was nearby, watching everything with the security cameras. 

Humming quietly, Misa picked at her nails as she continued to look around at all the faces. Light glanced away, picking at his half-eaten bagel. He heard footsteps approaching them. "Light, I thought you had a boyfriend." The teasing voice belonged to Takada. He heard Misa draw in a surprised gasp. 

"I do," Light said. "Misa is just a friend of mine." 

"Well if you're out with friends, may I join you?" Takada gestured to the empty seat and Light nodded. She slid into it and sent him a sad smile. He braced himself for the next thing she said. "I'm so sorry for what happened to your father. I can't help but feel it was my fault. If I hadn't held that press conference-" She stopped midsentence to wipe away a few tears. "I'm so sorry." 

Feeling a bit of pity for her, Light said, "Kira would have killed my father regardless. He just chose the press conference to send a message."

"Light, Misa's trying to signal you."

Confused, Light glanced over at Misa, who looked very pale and worried. She nodded to Takada and shook her head, crossing her fingers into an x. Light furrowed his eyebrows at her. What was she trying to say? Before Light could say anything, Takada gently touched his arm to get his attention again. Her eyes darted to Misa, who quickly lowered her hands into her lap. "Are there any more updates on the Kira case?" Takada asked. "Are you closer to finding him?" 

"Say no," L said. "Don't give her any information." He sounded worried. 

"We're trying our best," Light said as a feeling of dread crept into him. Something was very wrong. "But we haven't uncovered much else. It's very difficult to catch a killer who seems to have such supernatural powers." For a moment, Takada looked delighted at his answer. 

"Well, I'll leave you to your lunch." She reached over and squeezed Light's arm. "Please come to me if you need anything." She stood and walked away, smiling over her shoulder at Light. 

As soon as she was out of earshot, Misa leaned in, eyes wide and said, "She's Kira!" 

Time seemed to stop. Kiyomi Takada was Kira? It made no sense. Light stared at Misa and tried to find the right words to say. Instead of finding his voice, he felt rage building inside of him. How dare she pretend to be sorry for the loss of his father. She killed him. She struck him down in front of everyone and pretended to comfort Light as he held his body. All along Takada was planning to kill his father. She felt no remorse. Takada was the one responsible for all of the murders. She was Kira. She was a murderer. She was destroying the world. He clenched his hands in fury as the thoughts whirled in his mind. Yet Takada pretended to feel sorry for it all. 

"How? She was at the press conference and I didn't see her write down Soichiro's name?" L asked. His voice almost sounded distant.  

"You can write a name in the Death Note ahead of time," Misa said quietly. "She must have written Chief Yagami's name and time of death before the press conference started."

Turning his head, Light stared after Takada. He could barely see her retreating form. He reached into his bag and found the Death Note, which he had decided to keep with him just in case. Clutching it, Light pulled it out along with a pen. Misa looked to Light with a worried expression, but she didn't say a word. It would be so easy. All he had to do was write down Kiyomi Takada's name. He flipped the notebook open. It would only take a few pen strokes to cleanse the world. No blood would be spilled. Everything would be over quickly and smoothly.  

"Light! Don't!" 

Everything was loud. Blood pounded in Light's ears as he began to write the first few characters of Takada. The noise drowned out L's voice. His protests wouldn't matter in a few moments. There was no point in putting off the inevitable.    

"We need to arrest her! Misa stop him!"  

Reaching across the table, Misa grabbed the pen and Death Note from Light before he could write the last character of Kiyomi. Her eyes were wide in fear, but she clutched the Death Note tight. "Give that back!" Light snarled, nearly leaping across the table to grab it. 

"But Light," Misa said, voice unsure. "I thought we were going to arrest Kira." 

"That woman is worthless! She'll be given the death penalty anyway. We should just stop this now!" Taking a deep breath, Light held out his hand. The world was spinning out of his control. All he needed to do was to convince her to return the Death Note and it would be over quickly. "Misa, please. Give it back." His hand trembled. It would be so easy. Takada didn't deserve to live. She deserved to be wiped from the planet. "Can't you see I'm right? She killed my father." The determined look on Misa's face began to crumble. "Don't I deserve to get revenge? What about that robber? You killed him with the Death Note." Misa's grip on the Death Note loosened.

Before Light got the chance to snatch it back, the notebook was ripped from Misa's fingers. She squeaked in surprise and looked up to see L backing away with the Death Note tight in his grip. He scowled at Light, dark eyes filled with fury. Though when their gazes met, L's expression crumbled and his eyes widened in fear instead. "I won't let you become a murderer Light," He said quietly. 

Angry tears stung Light's eyes as L clenched his hands, bending the Death Note in his hands. "What's the point of drawing this out any longer?" He snapped. "We could end this right now." 

"No. You know it would be wrong." 

Ripping his eyes away from Light, he looked to Misa. She stared above L's head, reading the name there. Guilt overwhelmed Light. He had exposed L. His rash actions allowed Misa, a complete stranger to learn his name. Remembering the elation he felt when he first learned L's name, Light suddenly felt disgusted with himself. He stood and began to walk off. "Light! Where are you going?" Misa called after him.

Shoving his hands into his pockets, Light continued on his way, eyes downcast. 

"Scary," Beyond Birthday had said, breathing in Light's face. "There's a passion in your eyes, a fury. I've seen the same look in my eyes. I bet you could have become a serial killer in another life."

Apparently, Beyond Birthday turned out to be right.     

 

Outside, it was raining. L tapped his fingers across the Death Note's cover and glanced at the clock again. Why hadn't Light come back? He played with his ring, pulling it on and off repeatedly. It was getting late. For a moment, he wondered if he was wrong in stopping Light. He flipped open the book and stared at the unfinished name. It was tempting to end everything right then and there, but L knew they could just as easily arrest Takada with the help of Misa. It would be better that way. He feared that if either he or Light began to use the Death Note they wouldn't stop. Tracing his thumb against his lips, L remembered the expression on Light's face. It scared him seeing the fury and vengeance in Light's eyes. He looked like a monster. L pushed the thought away but knew that it would linger in the back of his mind for a long time.

"Is Light coming back soon?" 

Raising his eyes, L stared across the kitchen table at Misa. She had become a loose end, knowing his real name. He planned on not letting her out of his sight until the investigation ended. "I don't know." 

With a nod, Misa lowered her eyes. "I'm sorry," She said quietly.

"This isn't your fault." Standing with a sigh, L pulled out his phone, holding it gingerly between two fingers as listened to the dial tone. 

"L? What is it?" Sayu sounded cheerful, which told L immediately that she had not seen her brother recently. L felt grateful that she had not been able to stay for the stake out. She didn't need to see what had happened. 

"I'm guessing you haven't seen Light recently, have you?" 

"Light's missing?" Sayu's voice raised several pitches. "For how long? Where did you last see him?" She sounded on the verge of tears as she asked, "Kira hasn't killed him has he?" 

"It's more complicated than that," L said. He would prefer not to reveal what had occurred to Sayu. Rubbing the back of his leg with his foot, L sighed. "Maybe, would you have any idea where Light might go when he's really upset?" 

"He hasn't come home because you got into a fight again?" 

L considered his answer before quietly saying, "Something like that."

"I don't know. Sometimes when we were little Light would go to the park near our house to be alone. There's a park near your apartments, isn't there? Look for him there." 

"Thank you Sayu." He hung up the call and looked to Misa, pointing at her. "Do not go anywhere while I'm gone." She nodded. "There's cake in the fridge if you want any." Picking up the Death Note and locking it in the living room safe, L pulled on his shoes and hurried out the door with an umbrella in hand. 

The park was eerily empty. Raindrops splashed off of the trees and concrete, filling it with the quiet sounds of millions of impacts. L walked along the paths until he spotted a lone figure sitting in the rain on a bench. Relief filled him. He walked over and stood behind Light, leaning over so the umbrella covered them both. "You're going to get sick." 

Leaning his head back to look up at L, Light quietly said, "Aren't I already?" His eyes were mournful, nothing like the expression L had seen earlier. L leaned down and kissed him, running his hand over his forehead to push the wet hair back out of his eyes. 

"Come home," L said quietly with a hand on Light's shoulder. 

"I don't deserve you." 

"Light-"

"I would have done it. I would have killed Takada and I know I wouldn't have stopped there." Light clenched his hands. "This world, sometimes all I can see is the filth in it. Sometimes there is no sun on the horizon. Everything about it is rotten. Those criminals did nothing for society. They're the ones responsible for destroying it." With a trembling sigh, Light continued, "I would have become Kira. I know I would have." He looked back up with an agonized expression. "I would have killed you." L's chest ached and he reached out again, stroking Light's cheek. "I would have killed everyone." L remained quiet, listening to Light's declaration, knowing deep down that every word of it was true. "I don't know if I can truthfully say that I am a good person." 

"Can anyone?" L asked. He leaned over and wrapped his arm around Light's shoulders, hugging him tight. "Light, if I had found that notebook I can guarantee I would have used it as well. Many people would." He kissed the side of Light's head and leaned his head against his.

"You wouldn't use it," Light said. 

"Why do you say that?" 

"Because you would know it was wrong. You would be tempted and I wouldn't be surprised if you wrote a few names, but you would stop before you became a monster." With a quiet laugh, Light shook his head. "I wouldn't stop, nothing would make me stop." A few tears slid down his cheeks, trailing across L's cheek as well.

"Don't call yourself a monster," L said softly. Light did not respond. "Let's go home. We will end this soon and Kira will be arrested, then we will never have to think about that notebook again." With a nod, Light turned his head and kissed L. His lips tasted like salt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates are on Mondays and Wednesdays. Thank you for all of your kudos and comments.


	7. Chapter 7

Everything in the plan fell on Misa. She played with the bracelet and shot a worried glance at Rem. If she failed then all of the task force could be killed. "Relax," L had said. "All you have to do is get her alone and get her to confess to being Kira. Press the bracelet once you've accomplish that and the task force will be there to arrest her." 

"You do not have to do this," Rem said with a soft expression. 

Misa shook her head. "I need to." With a smile, she touched Rem's hand. "And you won't let anything happen to me." The shinigami nodded. Though a solemn looked crossed her face. 

Rounding the corner, Misa approached Kiyomi Takada's dressing room. It was still early in the day so not many of the news crew were around. After taking a deep breath, Misa knocked. After a moment Takada answered. She narrowed her eyes at Misa. "How can I help you?" 

Lowering her voice, Misa said with strong conviction, "You're Kira aren't you?" 

Takada looked shocked. She gestured for Misa to enter before quickly closing the door. "Who are you exactly?" 

Before Takada got the chance to doubt Misa's intention, she reached into her bag and pulled out the Death Note. As she shuffled in her bag, she turned on the tape recorder. "Here, I have one too. I also made the eye deal." She blinked and held out the notebook. "That's how I knew you were Kira. I couldn't see your lifespan." 

"You have one too," Takada said, visibly relieved. She walked over to her bag and pulled out her Death Note, holding it out to Misa. They exchanged the notebooks and both looked to see the other's shinigami. 

"Ryuk," Rem said, nodding to the creature who suddenly appeared. 

Apple in hand, Ryuk grinned back. "Hey long time no see." 

"I'm guessing you are here because you want to join the cause," Takada said quietly. Her fingers drummed against the cover of Misa's Death Note. "That's convenient." Something in her expression frightened Misa. She stepped closer to Rem and flipped open Takada's Death Note, gasping in surprise at all the names written there. "So, how far have you gotten?" 

Eyes darting back up, Misa shot a worried glance at Rem. If Takada opened the Death Note, she would see her own unfinished name. "Um," Misa began to say. 

"Ryuk, you have been in the human realm for some time haven't you?" Takada looked up at Rem and left Misa's Death Note closed. 

"Yeah, it just took a while to find the most interesting person," Ryuk said with a wave of his hands. "Most of the humans I encountered were terrified of the Death Note." He picked up an apple and took a loud bite out of it. "First kid it fell into the hands of killed himself from sheer terror." He nodded to Takada. "But Kiyomi, she has quite the vision, it's entertaining to watch unfold." 

A soft smile crossed Takada's face. "Everything I've done was for one person," She said. "Light Yagami." Misa perked up at that news, raising her eyebrows in surprise. "We dated briefly in college and it was the best experience of my life. He's the most intelligent man I've ever met and his sense of justice...it inspired me to act." 

"But you killed his father!" 

At Takada's harsh glare, Misa shrunk back. "I'll find some way to cover that up." Her fingers trailed across Misa's Death Note again. Clenching her hands, Takada continued, "As well as some way to kill L." With a frustrated sigh, she shook her head. "If I had traded for the eyes, I would have seen his name." She snorted. "I can't believe Light is dating him." 

"Actually, Light's engaged to marry him," Misa said. Takada's glare suggested to her that it would have been better to remain quiet. 

Though Takada looked intrigued after a few seconds. "You've met him? You must know his name then!"  

"Uh I-"

"Perfect! Write it down here!" Takada flipped open the notebook and Misa gasped. With a shaky hand, she hit the button on her bracelet. Surely, she had gotten enough information out of Takada to secure prison time. Misa watched in horror as Takada looked down at the three names. "This is my name. Or at least it's almost my name." She stared back at Misa with a furious gaze. "You're working with the police." 

"Oh no." 

"Fine then!" Takada snapped as she pulled out a pen. "I'll force you to write down L's name and then kill you!"

There was a fluttering noise as Rem pulled a Death Note of her own out. "Don't," She growled. Takada turned to stare at her in surprise as Ryuk burst into laughter. "If you kill her, your life is forfeit." 

Takada's expression twisted into one of pure rage. "I could have used you! It would have been easy to convince Light that a ditz like you killed his father. All I would have had to do is write his name in your Death Note." 

Outraged, Misa stomped her foot. "Well that's not going to happen! I would never do something like that to Light!" 

Before Takada could do anything, the door flew open. Misa quickly moved aside to allow Aizawa and Matsuda in. They both held their guns pointed right at Takada, who froze in surprise. "Kiyomi Takada you are under arrest for the suspicion of being Kira!" 

"Drop the Death Note!"

Misa sighed in relief and leaned against the wall, her chest heaving hard. Takada obeyed, dropping the Death Note with a quiet, angry curse under her breath. As the detectives occupied themselves with handcuffing her, Misa picked up the other Death Note. As the others filed out, L slipped inside. "Here," Misa said, holding both notebooks and the tape recorder out to the detective. He nodded to her and took them. 

"You did well," L said, flipping through Takada's Death Note. He seemed satisfied that all the names were there. 

"It was the scariest thing I've ever done!" With a laugh, Misa shook her head. "But I think I did the right thing." 

L nodded and patted her head. "Yes, you did." As he turned to leave, he glanced back over his shoulder. "And Ms. Amane?" 

"Yes?" 

"I expect you will keep my name to yourself." 

Eyes bright and wide, Misa glanced at the floating letters above L's head. L Lawliet. She nodded. "I will." 

"Good. Light will likely kill you if anything happens to me." 

If L's comments were supposed to be a joke, they were not funny. Though by his deadpan expression, Misa wasn't entirely sure that he was joking. She laughed nervously and looked to Rem, who seemed annoyed. Before L left the room completely, she spoke up, "L Lawliet." The detective glanced back. "I have one more request of you." He nodded, eyes searching the shinigami's face for any sort of hint. "Every 490 days, please let Misa touch that Death Note again. If she doesn't, she will lose ownership of it and I will no longer be able to be with her." 

"What?" Misa asked, shocked. "I didn't know that!" 

"Sure," L said. "I see no issue with that." He smirked slightly. "I suspect you would threaten to kill me if I said no." 

With that said, L left and Misa was alone in the dressing room. 

The cherry blossoms fell as Sayu posed proudly for a photo with all of her friends. L fidgeted with his tie, until Light caught his hand and held it tight in his own. They exchanged small smiles. It had been a week and a half since Takada was arrested. In order to hide the existence of the Death Notes, Watari handled her prosecution and detainment. She was sentenced to life in prison. While Light would have preferred she receive the death penalty, he still felt some satisfaction at the fact that they had captured her. 

"Light!" Sayu hurried over. She looked beautiful in her bright purple hakama. "Remember Mahiko and Yukari!" Just like his sister, her two friends were all grown up. 

"Wow Sayu," One of the women, Mahiko Light believed, said. "Your brother has gotten even more handsome!" 

"You must be Light's really rich boyfriend!" Yukari said to L. "The one who bought Sayu all of Misa Misa's dress collection." 

Light smirked as the attention was pulled off of him onto L. "Ah, it wasn't every dress," L said, scratching at his cheek in embarrassment. 

"Ryuzaki bought me this hakama too." 

The three of them all laughed as L's face flushed from embarrassment. On Light's other side, Sachiko smiled. "Let's take another picture of everyone together!" 

"Mom," Light protested quietly, but allowed his mother to shove him and L between Sayu and her friends, who flashed peace signs at the camera. 

"I'm so proud of you sweetheart," Sachiko said with a smile. "I know your father would have been proud too."

"I know," Sayu said with a sad smile. "I'll be at the top of my class at the police academy. I already scored really high on the entrance exam!" Sachiko nodded, dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. 

"You'll protect us from all the criminals!" Yukari said, poking at Sayu's cheek. She laughed and her and her friends hurried back over to the rest of their graduating class to continue to mingle.

"Light," Sachiko said quietly. "Ryuzaki." L looked over at her with a surprised look. "I wish Soichiro could have been here for your wedding as well." The only reason they were having a small wedding at all was because of Sachiko. Light nodded. "I'm sorry if I've been not the most supportive of your relationship." With tears at her eyes, she turned to them with a sad smile. "We need to cherish happiness when we can." 

As the excitement of the graduation died down, Light and L headed home. Sayu had gone out drinking with the rest of her friends, though Light suspected she wouldn't do too much drinking of her own. Sayu hated alcohol. "We should work together more often," L said softly. Light looked to him with a surprised glance. 

"Really?" He tilted his head and sighed. "I'm glad you've decided that now that I've been offered my Dad's title." 

Surprised, L looked back at Light. "Really? You're going to be Chief of the NPA?" 

Light nodded, rubbing his thumb on the back of L's hand. "I understand that we can't always work together," He said. "And I know that I may never know everything about you and that's alright." He traced his thumb over L's ring. "I just want to be by your side."  

L hummed under his breath and shook his head. "I want you to know everything about me." Squeezing Light's hand, L smiled over at him. "So, let me tell you everything." Turning to face Light, he cupped his face in his hands and kissed him. "I don't want there to be any secrets between us." 

"L," Light sighed, hugging him closer. "Absolutely." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your kudos and comments.


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